Play

At 8.30 this morning, Emily's class was due to perform a play at the local municipal hall to celebrate Independence Day. It finally got started more than an hour later, allegedly because the local council, in a fit of pique at not being invited to attend, refused to provide an electrician to set up the lighting and sound. Can that possibly be true? It sounds horribly plausible...

Vomit

Phoebe: "Dad, when Emily woke up in the middle of the night and had to be sick, she was so quiet that no one even heard her.* That was very silly. When I need to be sick I always shout out 'Vomit!' in my loudest voice and everyone comes running to help me. I sometimes swear, too.**"

* This is true. The poor love felt rotten but she tiptoed around so as not to wake anyone up.
** This is also true. Strangely enough, being verbally abused by Phoebe while holding a bucket for her to throw up into is not among my most cherished memories...